What does this have to do with gratitude and positive reinforcement you might ask? Saying thank you [in person] or telling someone they did a good job is awkward for me. Watch me do it [please, don't] sometime - it's almost as bad as watching me say good bye. Saying thank you and expressing gratitude is an out reach of emotion that I don't do very well. My 'good jobs' unless rehearsed come out worse than an absent father's pats on the back: "Good on ya.... uh.... buddy." In a job where I oversee many students who crave public emotional and positive reinforcement this doesn't go over very well.
Several recent events have led me to consider why bad things happen to good people and how my answer [because they do, and there is nothing you can do about it] means that we have to take advantage of every precious moment and get better at telling people that they have made an impact upon our lives. You really might not get another chance. So, in honor of this, I provide you below a list of things and people [by no means an exhaustive list] that I am thankful/grateful for. Throwing it out to the webz in general is a bit of a chicken shit way of expressing emotion and gratitude, but baby steps:
Things Miranda is Thankful For:
- My epic parents who have faced every health problem with grace and shown me how a loving couple can pull through anything. They fostered my love for reading, theater, travel and odd things. Thank you.
-My partner. Someone who loves me, cares for me, supports me, supports my insane ideas and stands guard against my insecurities, always reminding me that I can do anything - except say hi to every dog I meet on the street. He told me that was weird [It is NOT].
-The remaining list of people (P,N,M,B): you all bring something extremely special to my life. You are the rare besties (N/B) and siblings (P/M) that someone can go weeks or months without speaking to, but pick up literally, with every inside joke intact, where we left off. You four have supported me through it all with love and just the right amount of critical judgment.
- Our tiny, adorable, lovely apartment.
- Good health and high spirits, specifically the latter when one doesn't have the former.
- Working at a job where I am supported, encouraged, teased [bitches, you just don't get mah weirdness! It's awesome!] and challenged. Where everyone else works with professionalism [sometimes] and energy [always].
- The thrill of options for the future, and the privilege to have them.
- Traveling. Stay tuned for more exciting updates.
- Students who come in defensive and lower their own shields to have honest conversations with me
- My insane family, blood, marriage and by choice related. In your own way you teach me lessons every single day about good things and bad and how not to act. 90% of you are off your rockers, but you likely argue that about me as well.
- My marathon training, and all the lessons I've learned while putting one foot in front of the other for each mile I run. I'm learning patience, discipline, how to swallow my unhealthy amount of pride, how to commit to something and follow through, what body glide is and how it can save your life, and most importantly, how to come in last with a smile.
- All of the people that I call friends.
- Coffee, elixir of the gods.
- Everyone who contributed to my studies of Judaism. I don't talk about this part of my education much, but it was one of the most impacting areas of study of my entire educational career.
- Ditto on the above with my Master's thesis. That bitch didn't write itself, and it certainly didn't come from me alone.
- Flan. Judge me.
- Living on State St in one of the best cities in the world. I wake up and look out our 17th floor window every morning and I don't think I'll ever get tired of this view or of telling people who ask, "Oh do you live around here?" "Yeah..... on this street, a few blocks that way."
- All the mentors who have provided reality checks and criticism.
- The opportunity I had to work in the food service industry - try it, it'll change your perspective on people and those who wait on you. Tip yo servers!
- The baby blanket I still have. JUDGE ME.
- Puppies. Big ones.
- You. For taking the time to read what I have to say when you likely had much better things to be doing. Thanks, yo.
To everyone I know fighting battles, I love you. Cancer's a bitch, Drunk Driving is dumb as hell, and infidelity sucks. But guess what - you're awesome. Really you are, and the best part about life sucking is eventually it gets better and easier. You're stronger than you know - and more loved than you could imagine.
How is that for an outpouring of emotion? I'm going to go robot my way through the rest of my day as I just expended my daily amount into one blog post. It wasn't as awkward as I thought.
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